Social media and relationships

As your child grows up, they may want to meet new people and develop friendships outside of their immediate family.

Introduction

As your child grows up, they may want to meet new people and develop friendships outside of their immediate family. Some people will be involved in things like sport, hobby groups or other after school/group activities where they can meet other people with similar interests. For other people, socialising and making friends online might be preferred due to social anxieties, communication difficulties or poor accessibility of community locations.  Some people might not have any interest in meeting new people. All of this is OK.

For children today, social media and technology is an important part of the way they develop skills including:

  • digital media literacy
  • collaborative learning
  • relationship development and maintenance
  • creativity
  • communication

Children can surprise us with how quickly they adapt to new technology and social media platforms. This might be concerning for parents,  particularly if they did not grow up with internet-connected devices themselves. Parents are often concerned about bullying and abuse occurring online and may want to block or restrict their child from socialising online.

It’s important to remember that digital technology like social media is now an ingrained part of how children and young people connect with their peers, including children with intellectual disability and/or autism spectrum disorder. It is impractical to cut your child off platforms where the majority of their peers are interacting, and doing so can have negative impacts by limiting their access to information and emotional support.

Supporting your child to navigate social media safely can be a positive step in developing and maintaining relationships. To keep your child safe on social media, it’s important to support them to understand the risks involved and strategies for keeping safe.

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Conversation Starters

I know you’d like to create a (social media platform) account. Let’s sit down and talk about how to stay safe, and what a (social media platform) friend is.
Sometimes people lie about who they are online. How would you make sure you know who you’re talking to when you’re on (social media platform)?
Sometimes people can say hurtful things online, or they might not understand what you are saying. What would you do if someone made you feel bad online?

Strategies for you to try

Help your child set up their accounts and be a safe person with passwords
Most social media platforms require users to be aged 13 and older. If your child shows interest in creating a social media account, go through the process with them so they can ask questions and you can make sure they are putting the appropriate information into the account. As a parent, you are also well placed to be a safe person to look after passwords that might be forgotten. Knowing passwords will also help you supervise your child’s social media usage.
Communicate with your child when you supervise their social media
If you do have the passwords to your child’s social media accounts, it’s important to communicate about when and why you access it. Just like a diary, the contents of instant messaging can be very personal. If you have concerns, involve your child in any monitoring of social media that you do.
Include rules about social media usage in a family tech agreement
Check out the Cybersafety page for information about creating a family technology agreement. Include social media use and apps in the agreement for the whole family to follow. For example, no devices during dinner time or phones staying in the common area while you are asleep.
Talk to your child about what they see on social media
Just as you would talk to your child about what they did at school, ask them about what interesting things they have seen on their social media. Normalising the discussion about interesting videos, comments or pictures your child sees online can help you to monitor the type of content your child is accessing. It also allows you to provide support if your child sees something that is upsetting or that they do not understand.
Create a list of reminders for your young person to refer to when socialising online
Work with your child to develop a list or poster of rules and reminders for them to refer to when using social media. This could include things like:
  • blocking and security settings
  • positive qualities and behaviours of a person who is socialising appropriately
  • things that might lead you to ignore, block or report a person, like swearing, harassment or other invasive online behaviour
protect from abuse

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Introduction to puberty for girls
Social media and relationships

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