The changes that happen to your child during puberty aren’t just physical changes to the body. There are social changes that happen as well. Understanding what these changes are will help you to prepare yourself and your child for what might happen as your child ages. Remember, puberty can start from the age of 8, so it is important to prepare as early as possible.
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Conversation Starters
Your sister has a new boyfriend. Have you ever thought about whether you want a boyfriend or girlfriend too?
You’ve been doing so well lately speaking to the worker at the takeaway shop. Did you want to try ordering the food by yourself next time?
The teenager on that show just told their mum that they want to spend more time by themselves. Is that something you ever think about?
Strategies for you to try
Reflect on your own values and expectations
Think about your personal, cultural and religious values. Think about what you want life to look like for your child in the future. What do you want them to be able to achieve? What do you want their relationships to look like? Thinking about these things in advance will help you to respond to your child if they express a desire for more independence.Support your child to be more independent
Independence looks different for every child. Consider the skills that your child has now, and think about how you can give them opportunities to continually build those skills. For example:- If your child needs assistance putting clothes on, they could choose the outfit they want to wear. If they struggle with having too many options, you could start by asking them to pick between two different outfits that you have selected
- If your child wants to make new friends but they have difficulty talking to strangers, they could practice ordering food at the takeaway shop. Or you could take them to the corner store to buy some milk. Stay at the door and let your child choose the milk and pay for it
- If your child is building their cooking skills, have them choose and prepare a meal once a week. They may choose to just prepare toast for everyone – that is okay. Accept that, as it is their choice. You can always build up to “better” meals
CID What Will Give Me a Good Life workbook series
