Developing sexual feelings is a normal part of growing up. Young people with intellectual disability and/or autism spectrum disorder will experience these feelings just like everybody else.
Concerns
What does sexual attraction feel like?
How to tell if someone likes you back?
Talking about rejection
Sometimes it can be difficult to think about your child having sexual feelings. You may have concerns about your child’s ability to:
- recognise these feelings
- express these feelings appropriately
- understand if someone reciprocates their feelings
- understand what it means to have a boyfriend or girlfriend
The first step in supporting your child to understand sexual feelings is helping them to understand what it feels like. You can talk to your child about the different things a person can feel when they are attracted to someone. For example you might explain to your child that when they have sexual feelings about someone they might:
- think about the person a lot
- want to be with the person a lot
- want to touch, hug or kiss the person
- have butterflies in their tummy
- feel hotter in their body
- have tingling in their private body parts. Males might get an erection, or females might get wet and slippery in their vagina. They might feel like masturbating
- touching, hugging or kissing can only happen when both people consent. Both people have to say ‘yes’ Consent in Relationships.
- masturbation is a private behaviour and needs to be done in a private place
Once your child understands what it feels like to be attracted to someone it can be good to talk to them about how to tell if that person likes you back. Unfortunately, people aren’t always straightforward in expressing how they feel. It can be helpful to talk to your child about other ways they can tell if someone has feelings for you.
You can use pictures of how people might behave if they are attracted to someone. This could include people:
- leaning in to each other during conversation
- touching a person’s arm or shoulder
- laughing at each other’s jokes
- inviting a person to spend more time together
As unpleasant as it is, it is important to talk to your child about rejection. It is a part of life for everyone and your child needs to know that liking someone or having sexual feelings for someone doesn’t mean they will like you back. This might not feel very good but it is it is nobody’s fault. Sometimes people just don’t feel the same way. That is OK. Reassure your child that while it may hurt now, they will feel better soon.
The best way to support your child with rejection is to continue to build their confidence and self-esteem. It is easier to cope with rejection if you feel good about yourself.
For information on preparing your child for a relationship go to Relationships.
Concerns
What does sexual attraction feel like?
How to tell if someone likes you back?
Talking about rejection
Sometimes it can be difficult to think about your child having sexual feelings. You may have concerns about your child’s ability to:
- recognise these feelings
- express these feelings appropriately
- understand if someone reciprocates their feelings
- understand what it means to have a boyfriend or girlfriend
The first step in supporting your child to understand sexual feelings is helping them to understand what it feels like. You can talk to your child about the different things a person can feel when they are attracted to someone. For example you might explain to your child that when they have sexual feelings about someone they might:
- think about the person a lot
- want to be with the person a lot
- want to touch, hug or kiss the person
- have butterflies in their tummy
- feel hotter in their body
- have tingling in their private body parts. Males might get an erection, or females might get wet and slippery in their vagina. They might feel like masturbating
- touching, hugging or kissing can only happen when both people consent. Both people have to say ‘yes’ Consent in Relationships.
- masturbation is a private behaviour and needs to be done in a private place
Once your child understands what it feels like to be attracted to someone it can be good to talk to them about how to tell if that person likes you back. Unfortunately, people aren’t always straightforward in expressing how they feel. It can be helpful to talk to your child about other ways they can tell if someone has feelings for you.
You can use pictures of how people might behave if they are attracted to someone. This could include people:
- leaning in to each other during conversation
- touching a person’s arm or shoulder
- laughing at each other’s jokes
- inviting a person to spend more time together
As unpleasant as it is, it is important to talk to your child about rejection. It is a part of life for everyone and your child needs to know that liking someone or having sexual feelings for someone doesn’t mean they will like you back. This might not feel very good but it is it is nobody’s fault. Sometimes people just don’t feel the same way. That is OK. Reassure your child that while it may hurt now, they will feel better soon.
The best way to support your child with rejection is to continue to build their confidence and self-esteem. It is easier to cope with rejection if you feel good about yourself.
For information on preparing your child for a relationship go to Relationships.
Concerns
Sometimes it can be difficult to think about your child having sexual feelings. You may have concerns about your child’s ability to:
- recognise these feelings
- express these feelings appropriately
- understand if someone reciprocates their feelings
- understand what it means to have a boyfriend or girlfriend
What does sexual attraction feel like?
The first step in supporting your child to understand sexual feelings is helping them to understand what it feels like. You can talk to your child about the different things a person can feel when they are attracted to someone. For example you might explain to your child that when they have sexual feelings about someone they might:
- think about the person a lot
- want to be with the person a lot
- want to touch, hug or kiss the person
- have butterflies in their tummy
- feel hotter in their body
- have tingling in their private body parts. Males might get an erection, or females might get wet and slippery in their vagina. They might feel like masturbating
- touching, hugging or kissing can only happen when both people consent. Both people have to say ‘yes’ Consent in Relationships.
- masturbation is a private behaviour and needs to be done in a private place
How to tell if someone likes you back?
Once your child understands what it feels like to be attracted to someone it can be good to talk to them about how to tell if that person likes you back. Unfortunately, people aren’t always straightforward in expressing how they feel. It can be helpful to talk to your child about other ways they can tell if someone has feelings for you.
You can use pictures of how people might behave if they are attracted to someone. This could include people:
- leaning in to each other during conversation
- touching a person’s arm or shoulder
- laughing at each other’s jokes
- inviting a person to spend more time together
Talking about rejection
As unpleasant as it is, it is important to talk to your child about rejection. It is a part of life for everyone and your child needs to know that liking someone or having sexual feelings for someone doesn’t mean they will like you back. This might not feel very good but it is it is nobody’s fault. Sometimes people just don’t feel the same way. That is OK. Reassure your child that while it may hurt now, they will feel better soon.
The best way to support your child with rejection is to continue to build their confidence and self-esteem. It is easier to cope with rejection if you feel good about yourself.
For information on preparing your child for a relationship go to Relationships.
Concerns
Sometimes it can be difficult to think about your child having sexual feelings. You may have concerns about your child’s ability to:
- recognise these feelings
- express these feelings appropriately
- understand if someone reciprocates their feelings
- understand what it means to have a boyfriend or girlfriend
What does sexual attraction feel like?
The first step in supporting your child to understand sexual feelings is helping them to understand what it feels like. You can talk to your child about the different things a person can feel when they are attracted to someone. For example you might explain to your child that when they have sexual feelings about someone they might:
- think about the person a lot
- want to be with the person a lot
- want to touch, hug or kiss the person
- have butterflies in their tummy
- feel hotter in their body
- have tingling in their private body parts. Males might get an erection, or females might get wet and slippery in their vagina. They might feel like masturbating
- touching, hugging or kissing can only happen when both people consent. Both people have to say ‘yes’ Consent in Relationships.
- masturbation is a private behaviour and needs to be done in a private place
How to tell if someone likes you back?
Once your child understands what it feels like to be attracted to someone it can be good to talk to them about how to tell if that person likes you back. Unfortunately, people aren’t always straightforward in expressing how they feel. It can be helpful to talk to your child about other ways they can tell if someone has feelings for you.
You can use pictures of how people might behave if they are attracted to someone. This could include people:
- leaning in to each other during conversation
- touching a person’s arm or shoulder
- laughing at each other’s jokes
- inviting a person to spend more time together
Talking about rejection
As unpleasant as it is, it is important to talk to your child about rejection. It is a part of life for everyone and your child needs to know that liking someone or having sexual feelings for someone doesn’t mean they will like you back. This might not feel very good but it is it is nobody’s fault. Sometimes people just don’t feel the same way. That is OK. Reassure your child that while it may hurt now, they will feel better soon.
The best way to support your child with rejection is to continue to build their confidence and self-esteem. It is easier to cope with rejection if you feel good about yourself.
For information on preparing your child for a relationship go to Relationships.
Conversation Starters
I have noticed you like to play with a particular friend a lot lately. How do they make you feel?
The person in the TV show just asked that woman on a date. This is because he likes her or has sexual feelings for her. Have you ever wanted to go on a date with someone?
You have grown up so much in the last year. Look at all the changes that your body has gone through. Part of growing up is also getting new feelings, like sexual feelings. Do you know what they are?